Caving It: Yet Another Bad Movie Trifecta Day

Right. So it is a rainy, miserable day here in Eastern PA so I decided to see what movies my wonderful cable company had to offer me. I ended up watching three movies, each more terrible then the one before it. And so …

FIRST MOVIE: Blow – 2001
I have seen this movie before and I think I really liked it the first few times I saw it, but I have now changed my mind. I think the only two reasons I liked this movie before was because of the hotness that is Johnny Depp and Penélope Cruz. However, seeing Blow again today with fresh (read: hungover) eyes gave me a whole new perspective. It just is not a good movie. It is over-acted, over-embellished and the only sex scene between Depp and Cruz belongs in a Sesame Street episode. Give me a good documentary on Pablo Escobar or Sid & Nancy over Blow any day.

SECOND MOVIE: Quarantine – 2008
I was actually stoked to see that this movie was on today because I really wanted to see it. I loved Jennifer Carpenter in The Exorcism of Emily Rose and she is amazing playing Dexter Morgan’s sister in Dexter. However, Quarantine was a journey into suckiness. Although I was pleased to hear that Carpenter didn’t lose her Emily Rose lungs, the movie itself was way over-the-top. Give me a good volume of Robert Kirkman’s The Walking Dead or The Blair Witch Project over Quarantine any day.

THIRD MOVIE: The X-Files: I Want to Believe – 2008
I forgot I actually reviewed this movie back in March of 2009. That was back when I was using sheep to rate my shit. Heh. I amuse myself. Gonna have to bring the sheep back soon I think. Anyway, I disliked The X-Files: IWTB when I reviewed it about a year ago (“I have no words for the ultimate stink fest that is IWTB …”) and I disliked it just as much today. Give me old X-Files reruns or the first two seasons of Chris Carter’s Millennium over The X-Files: IWTB any day.

So there you have it. A day of suck. Bad things always happen in threes, so I hope the next movie I watch gives me some sort of enjoyment, but who knows? Nonetheless, my weekend as a whole was actually quite enjoyable, but I suspect that is because none of them involved watching any movies.