* FEATURED INTERVIEWS: PARRY GRIPP JINGLES, STORM LARGE GOES BALLS OUT | LATEST MOVIE REVIEWS: SHERLOCK HOLMES, INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS | LATEST RANT: WE ARE TEH SUCK *

“China Doll”
They say I am a china doll-
And this may be true-
Though they haven’t looked, close enough to see –
Through the curio’s pane of glass-
That exposes my crack-
That is mended tight-
With cement glue-
That oozed enough to notice-
When you examine my face-
And then you’ll see-
The dust that has blended within-
My porcelain skin-
The missing eyelash-
And facial scuff-
I have not been…
“Handled with care.”
Wasn’t played with under super vision-
I’m better looking from a far-
A safe distance-
Where you can’t see that my collar is water stained ecru-
[Read more …]

Oscar Wild: The Results

by Jen on March 8, 2010

in Movies

No goose eggs here my little interweb car thieves. And so …

Performance by an actor in a leading role:
WINNER - Jeff Bridges in “Crazy Heart” (x) (*)
George Clooney in “Up in the Air”
Colin Firth in “A Single Man”
Morgan Freeman in “Invictus”
Jeremy Renner in “The Hurt Locker”

Performance by an actor in a supporting role:
Matt Damon in “Invictus”
Woody Harrelson in “The Messenger”
Christopher Plummer in “The Last Station”
Stanley Tucci in “The Lovely Bones”
WINNER - Christoph Waltz in “Inglourious Basterds” (x) (*)

Performance by an actress in a leading role:
WINNER - Sandra Bullock in “The Blind Side” (x)
Helen Mirren in “The Last Station”
Carey Mulligan in “An Education”
Gabourey Sidibe in “Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire” (*)
Meryl Streep in “Julie & Julia”

[Read more …]

Since ‘05 I’ve picked my wins, and almost always won in my group of friends. We have a betting pool. However, last year, I completely bombed, so I’m going to see if that was a fluke or if I am just not in-touch with films like I was back then. (Or at least the snobbery of the academy). Important Note: Most of the choices [I] made were a mixture of personal taste in combination with previous Academy choices and how they like to pick their movies.

Best Picture:
“Avatar”
“The Blind Side”
“District 9”
“An Education
(*) “The Hurt Locker”
“Inglorious Basterds”
“Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire”
(**) “A Serious Man”
“Up”
“Up In The Air”

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The 82nd Annual Academy Awards will air next Sunday, March 7, on ABC. Out of all the films nominated, I have actually only seen “Inglourious Basterds” and “Coraline”, but that’s not gonna stop me! And so, having learned nothing from my epic Grammy prediction failure, here are my predictions for the winners (Yes, I say “winner”. I never purported myself to be PC in the least.) in the ‘major” Oscar categories:

Performance by an actor in a leading role:
Jeff Bridges in “Crazy Heart” (x)
George Clooney in “Up in the Air”
Colin Firth in “A Single Man”
Morgan Freeman in “Invictus”
Jeremy Renner in “The Hurt Locker”

[Read more …]